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The 3 Ghosts of Letting Go

How many of you find yourself completely unable to let go of something, whether it’s a relationship, a situation, or even a person?

I think, as human beings, we tend to hold onto things because it’s a way for us to stay safe. I know, because we’ve all been there.

Recently, I recognized that I hadn’t let go of something because I felt if I had, then all “hell would break loose.” I wanted it so badly, but it was no longer aligning with who I am.

Yes, I wanted to be “safe” and say that if I continue to hold onto this, then nothing has changed, then I’m “safe.” But I no longer wanted to live in this blockage. I wanted to let myself do something more with that occupied space.

I really believe in: if it’s meant to be it will be

So, what did I decide to do?

For this exercise, I like to think of A Christmas Carol and introduce the 3 ghosts: Past, Present, and Future. Simply put: it’s a past, present, future reflection of your blockage.

I don’t simply mean to write down your life, as a way to vent. I mean, yes, that’s great, but in this exercise, we are getting deeper than that.

What I mean is, in order, to let it go, you need to write down everything. And I mean all of it! From what you thought about the person, thing, or situation, to where are you are now to where you’d like it to be.

It’s like you’re telling yourself a story!

Firstly, you acknowledge what you have experienced, how you felt, and all the little things that you loved, remembered, were angry, happy, sad, mad about. Write that all down!

In this state you’re allowing yourself to go through those memories and anything that you feel you’ve never addressed (emotionally). Anything that you’d like to reflect on, should be and can be done in order to help you move forward.

Keep in mind that when you’re reflecting, you’re gentle with yourself and what you went through. You did the best that you could with where you were!

Secondly, you ask yourself where you are now. What are you currently feeling? Go through all the intense emotions to allow yourself to feel your feelings and accept where you currently are!

In order to move forward, you need to begin by accepting!

In this part, it’s a huge self-reflective and possibly very angry or very relieving place of seeing who you currently are post-thing, situation or person.

In my current experience, I recognized some anger that had come up that I didn’t even know was there and simultaneously, a lot of happy, grateful emotions. Allowing myself to accept those emotions and write them down, I felt I was able to process those feelings.

Whatever you’re feeling it is important to acknowledge it all. There’s extreme courage in owning where you are because you are also recognizing how far you’ve come! And that’s incredible!

Thirdly, you project your future life. What do you want it to look like (without this blockage)?

Envision yourself happier and freer!

Ask yourself specifics like: What does your day-to-day look like? Who am I surrounding myself with? How can you create a better opportunity for myself?

This is my favorite stage because here you can let your imagination run wild! This exercise is great to allow myself to picture my life where I’d like it to be.

Word of caution: when you’re projecting, remind yourself that you’re not controlling it, rather this is what you desire and you’re letting it unfold how it’s meant to. Something I’ve really learned is that trying to control any outcome, won’t work. So, it’s best to set an intention, to set a picture, and know that if it’s in alignment with my highest self and who I’m meant to be, then it’ll unfold the way I’ve envisioned.

Sometimes, the outcomes may be different than how you picture, but it’s better than you’ve ever imagined! You can ask yourself: what if this goes better than I ever imagined?

In this stage, you’re allowing yourself to picture your future in the way that you feel is best for you, while acknowledging that it could be different! For helping with letting go and removing blockages, visualizing your happiest self always helps!

Sometimes, if, for example, you’re working on getting over a relationship, you could always picture what it would look like with and without that person. Be honest with yourself about the person and their contribution to your growth. It’s okay if it doesn’t align with you. Yes, it’s sad, but this will pass! Better things are coming!

Open yourself up to new possibilities, to amazing new experiences and people. Create your dream life! You have that power!

Be creative and have fun with visualizing! I always find creating a vision board for this is a great way to process as well!

Let yourself be free and enjoy! This is your life! You deserve it!

Always remember how incredible you are, realizing how far you’ve come, and how far you will continue to go!

If you’d like to talk more about it 1:1, please feel free to book a session here:

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